Bring it on
By Jennifer Warnick
For the Argonaut Editorial Board
A challenge to editor of WSU's newspaper,
the Daily Evergreen
Back in the day, the rivalry between Washington State University and the University of Idaho meant more than a cheesy "ancient history" homecoming slogan. The competition, particularly concerning the two football teams, was no walk in the park. It was a 8-mile walk, to be exact.
In 1938, the then-editor of the Argonaut, a man named William
McGowen, issued a friendly wager to the Daily Evergreen editor,
Lloyd Salt, on the outcome of the two schools' football game.
The bet: First, if the Cougars lost, Salt could not shave until
Christmas.
Second, and also if the Cougars lost, Salt would walk from Pullman
to the steps of the UI Administration Building and apologize
for everything insulting he said about the Vandals. The final
condition of this bet was that McGowen would carry out the same
above-mentioned conditions should, by some off-chance, the mighty
Vandals lose.
Flash forward to Sept. 18, 1999. The Vandals, for the first time
in 34 long years, defeated the Cougars 28-17.
So, it would seem that LAST year, Vandal victory would have been
ancient history. But alas, after our wind-knocking win, it is
now the Era of the Vandal. Even in Pullman.
It is this proof (along with the Cougar's shady 1999 record of
3-9, 1-7 in the Pac-10) that drives me to say there will be
yet another Vandal victory in the Battle of the Palouse. I'd
bet my hair color on it. And in fact, I will.
Similar to Argonaut editors of the past, I would like to issue
a challenge to one Ms. Candace Baltz, editor in chief of the
WSU Daily Evergreen, and the pseudo-tattooed, news anchor galore.
I, Jennifer Warnick, of pretty much sound mind and body, say
this:
If the Vandals win the said football game against the Cougars,
Sept. 23,
1) Ms. Baltz will dye her hair Vandal gold. And I, on the chance
that we lose, will dye my hair Cougar crimson. The dye must remain
for the span of at least one week.
If this is unacceptable to Ms. Baltz, I completely understand.
And, since I am a reasonable person, I will issue these alternate
challenges of which she may pick one should Vandal gold hair
not suit her.
2) The loser will temporarily tattoo the winning score, or the
mascot of the winning team to their cheek, forehead or chin.
3) The loser will shave her head, rather than dye it.
4) The loser may bike, rollerblade, hang glide, crawl, leap frog,
jog or walk to the winner's common area the Monday after the
game dressed in their native garb (school colors), and for 30
minutes starting at high noon, loudly congratulate the winning
school on their superiority and flawless victory.
5) The loser will place the winner's mascot, and a supporting
phrase (i.e. Wonderfully done, Vandal victors!) prominently on
the front page the entire week after the said game.
6) The loser will help with the delivery of two issues of the
respective newspaper. For example, the Argonaut is delivered
around 3 a.m. by a nice man named Chad. Ms. Baltz would rise
and shine, and assist Chad in his entire delivery of Argonauts.
The chosen condition must be agreed upon by both parties, and
signed, by the stroke of midnight the Friday before the game.
I eagerly await your response, Ms. Baltz, and the response of
your less-than-adequate football team come game time. After all
is said and done, remember this - blondes, especially Vandal-gold
blondes, have more fun.
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